Deep within all of us lies the desire for ultimate happiness in every part of our lives. For years it seemed as though true happiness was out of my reach. Despite all I had achieved, something was still missing: Something was not right. Why wasn’t I happy? The more I focused and the harder I tried to grasp it, the farther it seemed to move away from me.
Does this sound familiar? If it describes the place you are in right now, you know it is a frustrating place. I know, I’ve been there. I call this feeling “the struggle.” The challenge is that you don’t know how to move past it. Until now. Before you can “Live the Life You Love,” you must define what that life is to you. I call it “Your Blissful Life.”
How do you discover Your Blissful Life? There is a systematic approach. This process enabled me to discover my blissful life and it changed me forever. It was so empowering, so freeing, so exhilarating that I must share it with everyone.
Everyone at some point experiences “the struggle.” Regardless of age, race, gender, religion or socio-economic status, we have all experienced the struggle in some area of our lives. However, this struggle is rocking us to the core of who we are. It is rocking us to the core because it is a conflict between various aspects of ourselves. These aspects are often referred to as “parts” or “components” of our lives.
You must unconditionally accept the struggle you are experiencing. Embrace your struggle with all your heart and soul. It is a part of you and it makes you a unique individual. Millions of people around the world are currently experiencing, or will experience, similar thoughts and feelings. Once you finally decide to recognize it and accept the fact that you are in the midst of the struggle, you can begin to move past it. My recognition and acceptance of the struggle gave me the freedom and permission to do so. What does your recognition and acceptance give you?
Your recognition and acceptance enables you to start defining your blissful life. The following process enables you to start on your journey of discovery. Name all of the parts of your life. Most people immediately identify the more common parts such as father, brother, sister, mother, significant other, career, golfer, bowler, friends, or musician just to name a few. We are all made up of many parts. Simply list them as you identify them. Is there any part that is truly important to you that you have pushed aside?
Which parts are involved in the struggle? It is important to identify these by placing an asterisk next to the name; these are the parts you will want to work with first.
Rank your parts in order of importance to you. This provides you with a clear understanding of what is most important to you. Which part of your life is most important?
Specifically, define what you want in each part that you have identified. When I reached this step of the process, I asked myself the question, “What is my ultimate goal for this part?” I then answered it in detail. I described how I would feel once I achieved it, what I and others would be saying about me, and finally, all of the changes I would see. This enables you to clearly define what you want and how you will know when you have achieved it.
You then move on to defining what impact this will have on your life. Note how your life changes when you get exactly what you want. Ask yourself if you are willing to do what it takes to achieve your ultimate goal, no matter what it may be. How badly do you want this for yourself? Finally, how will getting what you want for this part fit in with your other parts? Are there any conflicts? If so, review the parts in conflict until you are satisfied with both goals. I found that there were actually very few conflicts, because when I sat down and focused on what I truly wanted, all of my parts seemed to naturally align themselves.
Congratulations! You have just started your journey towards defining your blissful life! Notice how good you feel at this moment. Multiply this feeling by one million. This is how you will feel when you complete the process for every part.
You can now continue walking toward Your Blissful Life. You must execute a Personal Contract with yourself: a simple, written statement that affirms that you are ready, willing and able to do whatever it takes to get exactly what you want for this part. Stating your goals is dreaming; writing them down and committing to them by using your Personal Contract is called goal setting.
Now that you have committed to your goals, you need to develop your course of action for achieving them. How do you plan to get from your current location to your blissful life? This course will lead you to your promised land. Once you define your path, you will automatically move toward it because the only destination possible is your blissful life. So how do you develop your plan?
You develop your plan by selecting one of your parts and re-reading your goal for it. Now, close your eyes and imagine you have already achieved your goal. Really get into that moment. Hear yourself, see yourself, and notice how good it feels having achieved your goal. Now, as you stand in your moment, look back to now and describe all the actions you took to get to this moment, right here, right now. These actions become your action plan for this part. Repeat this process for every one of your parts.
The final step in the process is action. You must take action in order to achieve your blissful life and live the life you love. If you have had issues with taking action in the past, you will find that it is now easy because you know exactly where you are headed. You are headed toward the destination you desire most, Your Blissful Life!
It has now been three years since I utilized this process. Today my life is filled with so much freedom, happiness and joy that I pinch myself daily. It feels as though I am floating with the clouds. The life that I once thought was unreachable is now alive and well within me. It is within you, too. What is Your Blissful Life?